Tuesday, January 31, 2012

"DETOX" - Part Three

I digressed a bit in Part Two by not filling in fully the events of the prior evening: I had finally settled into this hard bed with the harsh feeling sheets and blankets that are laundered in bulk and smell, well, like a hospital.  I was still wearing my clothes; I had not felt secure enough to put on pajamas.  As I said, I had propped open the bathroom door with a garbage can and turned off the bright, harsh lighting overhead.

The door opens and a young nurse says "I need to draw blood, I'll be down the hall."  I slowly drag myself out of bed wondering "what is this? why doesn't she just come in here and get it?"  This was the second notification that there are no conveniences or frills.  YOU GO for everything.  I walked out of the room and didn't see her in the long hallway.  As I made my way down, a door was open toward the end of the hallway and there she was, getting all the needles and vials ready to take my deep, red blood to be analyzed by strangers who will notify the doctors what is in my system, anything and everything. Well, of course, I had not had a pain pill in a week, which is why I was in this jail of a place.  But I am certain that since the orthopedic had given me a new knee some six weeks earlier and I had been on a pain drip in my IV, and then sent home with more pain medication, the stuff was embedded in my system and therefore, easily detectable.

There are no conveniences or frills in "the brown unit".  Each patient is responsible for coming to eat when it is announced on the loud speaker above your bed, come to take your meds, come to see your doctor - come, come, come - for this, for that, for everything, YOU GO!

Other than the nurse opening my door every hour to check on me, I slept relatively well.  I was exhausted.  It had been one week of hell that I never again want to experience.  I guess I know how a horribly addicted person feels they get addicted to street drugs and even prescribed medication and they are suddenly without them.  It is a living horror

At 6:00a.m. sharp, the loud speaker jars me announcing that the doctor is in and wants to see me!  This is when we all shuffle one by one down the hallway to the day room, each waiting for the doctor to see them.  By the time this process if finished, it's time for breakfast.

Feeling very anxious, I chose a seat at a table by myself.  I kept my head down as I buttered the cold biscuit and ate the cold scrambled eggs, and suddenly as lady sits down across from me.  She chatters away about the food, her family, her daughter's 50 year old black boyfriend who has moved in with them and shoved her up against the wall demanding money for his drugs. Her daughter, who is Caucasian, has two children by the man.  She says when she gets out of here, she is going to find an apartment by herself, that her monthly check is not going to this man anymore.  She distresses "I've only stayed this long for the sake of the children."  I am thinking "Oh my God, how awful, but she is talking non-stop and I wish she would just shut up and leave me be." 

I eat quickly and tell this woman that it was nice to meet her and I get up and put my tray in the bin. Her problems could very well become my problem because I am a nurturer and I felt to sorry for her.  I recognized that I cannot take on another problem, so I hurry away from her, feeling slightly guilty because I feel "she needs someone" and that someone at the moment was ME. Ironically, on the last day I am in the brown unit, the nurse reminds everyone not to get "close" to each other, or give out our personal information to another patient in the unit.

I am a Crowd Mother; I try to make everybody happy to the degree that I forget to take care of my own needs. This is ite clear to me.

A "nurse" appears and says, "it's time for  Group!"  People begin to slowly rise from their chairs and I make a bee-line to my room.  I close the door, lay on the bed and began to cry.  I am crying out my prayers to Jesus, Mary and St. Therese. All I can say is that my prayer, my conversation with Jesus this time was unlike any I had ever had with Him.  I felt His Presence and knew He was acknowledging me. "Please, Jesus, put your arms around me and make me feel safe."  At that moment, I felt something completely envelope me and I had chills all over.  I felt secure, comforted, and my crying stopped.  I knew Jesus was with me, and His Angels were giving me love and hope.  The Blessed Mother interceded for me, as well as St. Theresa in my prayers.  I asked the Lord for two miracles.  One, I found out on the way home from the hospital, was already in the works! Praise God! He is real and He loves me, He loves us all, and I'm seeing my prayer working at that very moment.

Anyway, I actually slept for two hours after that, and I really needed it.  I then decided to take a shower, but I realize I forgot my blow dryer.  Oh well, we'll leave the hair and bathe the rest.  My huspud is coming to see me at 7:30 on the dot and I want to be ready for him.  I bathe, put on clean clothing, socks and shoes and go to the small area of chairs where the telephones are to await his arrival.  I pick up a magazine and feign looking through it, but I'm checking out every person, every nuance, every word spoken in the day room.

The day room is full of people, maybe 15 or so?  There is a large-screen television and the same damn show has been running all day.  A group is playing "Spades" at a table.  I love Spades and I'd love to play, but I don't dare approach.  I suddenly realize that different "nurses" (I say that because I really don't know what they are) sit in the day room with a clipboard, and the light suddenly came on and said "they keep track of who is in the room, what times, what they are doing, what their mood is, etc."  Ohhhhh, now I see.  Well, I missed group, slept in my room for two hours and I am totally anti-social.  This is Saturday.  I eat my lunch and my dinner not speaking to anyone.  Funny, in hindsight, the next day, Sunday, a girl that I "made friends" with said "you didn't speak to anyone yesterday". I just chuckle .............

Huspud arrives and we settle in chairs facing one another.  We kiss a lot and perhaps the medication caused it, but I felt euphoric.  "Perhaps the medication caused it?" Geez, of course it did, Abbey!  But in any event, he is loving and kind and our hour together is wonderful.  It relieves him to see me in such good spirits.  He tells me he didn't sleep a wink the night before because he was so worried about me, not know what I was doing or how I was doing in the brown unit.  The next day, several of the female "inmates" tell me that my husband is really handsome, and I am proud!

When he is about to leave, I tell him that I forgot my Rosary, so I had to say it by counting on my fingers.  He has a pocket Rosary and it fit perfectly on my pointing finger.  We ask the nurse if I can keep it and she admonishes me, "Only if you promise you will keep in on your person at all times!" As I fall asleep that night, I have the Rosary safe on my finger and I play with it and say my Rosary and my prayers.

I hope that Part Four will be all of this series.  I want to talk about the people and my life since leaving the hospital.  Thank you for hanging with me through this process.  It is really cathartic, and though some (I know who you arrrrre!!!) may laugh and call me a "nut", well, pity on you!  It takes a VERY STRONG individual and BRAVERY to go through this process, much less, writing it all down in the hope that it will tell SOMEONE out there that there is nothing to fear.  Getting well is the best thing I ever did, even though this "addiction" was "prescribed" drugs and I was an innocent and naive patient, or else I would have chosen to discuss other options.  I wear the armour of God and HE is my Protector 24/7  I was allowed this experience, as I have been allowed, I sometimes feel, a lot more than some, for His purpose. Thanks be to God!  May I say, "LIFE IS GOOD, REALLY GOOD!"

Peace, Love & Joy for All,


Remember that Forgiveness is
Primarily For You!

Grudges take up brain capacity and prevent us from performing at our very best. What we focus our minds upon grows; this is true of hatred too. Therefore, it is impossible to truly achieve great things for ourselves when we have a lot of our energetic capacity tied up in negativity. To Forgive one another is probably one of the most difficult things that God asks of us

Remember that forgiveness is primarily for YOU. It free up your energy tremendously. So forgive all grudges, no matter how old they may be, and seek reconciliation. If you find this hard, begin with the easiest ones first. Then gradually work up to the harder ones.

All the years you have waited for them to "make it up to you" and all the energy you expended trying to make them change (or make them pay) kept the old wounds from healing and gave pain from the past free rein to shape and even damage your life.

And still they may not have changed.

Nothing you have done has made them change.

Indeed, they may never change. Inner peace is found by changing yourself, not the people who hurt you.

And you change yourself for yourself, for the joy, serenity, peace of mind, understanding, compassion, laughter, and bright future that you get."

THIS DAY'S . . .

It is an unhappy division that has been made between faith and works, though in my intellect I may divide them, just as in a candle I know there is both light and heat; but yet, put out the candle and they are both gone; one remains not without the other.  So it is betwixt faith and works.

~John Selden


"A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.  By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another."
John 13:34-35
The English Standard Version

Monday, January 30, 2012


I receive this Positive Thought today and when read it, I thought, "this would be a great thing for my husband and I to pledge to each other!"  But it also applies to other relationships, like your friends. I am hoping is it helpful to someone out there reading this!

A Credo For My
Relationship With Others

You and I are in a relationship, which I value and want to keep. Yet each of us is a separate person with unique needs and the right to meet those needs.

When you are having problems meeting your needs I will listen with genuine acceptance so as to facilitate your finding your own solutions instead of depending on mine. I also will respect your right to choose your own beliefs and develop your own values, different though they may be from mine.

However, when your behavior interferes with what I must do to get my own needs met, I will tell you openly and honestly how your behavior affects me, trusting that you respect my needs and feelings enough to try to change the behavior that is unacceptable to me. Also, whenever some behavior of mine is unacceptable to you, I hope you will tell me openly and honestly so I can change my behavior.

At those times when one of us cannot change to meet the other's needs, let us acknowledge that we have a conflict and commit ourselves to resolve each such conflict without either of us resorting to the use of power to win at the expense of the other's losing. I respect your needs, but I also must respect my own. So let us always strive to search for a solution that will be acceptable to both of us. Your needs will be met, and so will mine - neither will lose, both will win.

In this way, you can continue to develop as a person through satisfying your needs, and so can I. Thus, ours can be a healthy relationship in which both of us can strive to become what we are capable of being. And we can continue to relate to each other with mutual respect, love and peace.

~Dr. Thomas Gordon

THIS DAY'S . . .

 Christ has no body on earth now but yours, no hands but yours, no feet but yours.  Yours are the eyes through which to look out Christ's compassion to the world.  Yours are the feet with which He is to go about doing good, and yours are the hands with which he is to bless us now.

~Teresa of Avila
This Day's Verse
My son, do not despise the LORD'S discipline or be weary of his reproof, for the LORD reproves him whom he loves, as a father the son in whom he delights.
~Proverbs 3:11-12
The Revised Standard Version
This Day's Smile

The fact that I can plant a seed and it becomes a flower, share a bit of knowledge and it becomes another's, smile at someone and receive a smile in return, are to me continual spiritual exercises.

~Leo Buscaglia

Sunday, January 29, 2012


I love today's Positive Thought. I'll have a few comments afterward .....

You have to be happy to receive
the happy versions of other people !

With every single person you come into contact, you are either giving love or you're not.And based on what you give, that is what you receive.

Give love to others through kindness,encouragement,support,gratitude,or any good feeling , and it comes back to you multiplied in every area of your life.

Look for the things you love in a relationship more than you notice negative things and it will appear as if something incredible has happened to the other person.

You have to be happy to receive the happy versions of other people !

The force of love presents you with a whole array of Personal Emotional Trainers, disguised as everyday people, but they are all training you to choose love !

Life is presenting every person and circumstance to you so you can choose what you love and what you don't love.When you react to anything you are reacting with your feelings, and as you do,you are choosing it !

Changing the way you feel is easy compared to running around trying to change the circumstances of the outside world. Change your feelings and the outside circumstances will change !

~ by Rhonda Byrne
There is not a human being alive that has not been faced with circumstances of upheaval and/or adversity. There are, unfortunately, those in this world who thrive on negativity and because of their own unhappiness, they try to bring others (you) down with them.  Don't be fooled by Satan's lairs; he sets many for those who are the most devoted to the Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. It is his goal to steal as many of God's people as he can. Changing your ways and how you think is the first step to healing, and with that, confessing your sins openly and giving your whole heart and soul to Jesus.  These are all CHOICES!  You cannot blame anyone for your circumstances (waste of time anyway) and since YOU have a choice, only you can make positive changes in your lifeWhen you wear the armour of Jesus Christ, no matter what falls to your feet, you will win the battle and in the end, the war is won when you enter the Kingdom of Heaven.

God be with each of you this Sabbath day.  Make a choice to shake off those negative people in your lives, make a choice to keep your eye on the prize - Your Salvation Through the Body and Blood of Jesus Christ, and to live with Him for all eternity in the Kingdom of God.


Friday, January 27, 2012


Find out what making your wishes come true really feels like.


You're good, but you're going to be great.

You're the best, but you're going to get better.

Sometimes the paths we take are long and hard, but remember: those are always the ones that lead to the most beautiful views.

Challenges come along inevitably: how you respond to them determines who you are - deep down inside - and everything you're going to be.

Increase the chances of reaching your goals by working at them gradually. The very best you can do is all that is asked of you.

Realize that you are capable of working miracles of your own making. Remember that opportunities have a reason for knocking on your door, and the right ones are there for the taking.

You don't always have to win, but you do need to know what it takes to be a winner.

It's up to you to find the key that unlocks the door to a more fulfilling life.

Understand that increased difficulty brings you nearer to the truth of how to survive it - and get beyond it.

Cross your bridges.
Meet your challenges.
Reach out for your dreams, and bring them closer and closer to your heart.
Get rid of the "if only's" and get on with whatever you need to do to get things right.
Go after what you want in life, with all the blessings of all the people who care about you. And find out what making your wishes come true really feels like.

~ Collin McCarty ~  


I download often from iTunes and make my own custom mixes.  This song came to my mind the other night and I had no idea who sang it, I only knew the words "stay the night" .... I found it under Benjamin Orr.  A little history, Ben Orr was a member of The Cars, which I didn't know. I'm not sure of the date of this solo work of Orr's, but I found that he died from pancreatic cancer, tragically, at age 53 in October 2000, just days after his last appearance with The Cars in Atlanta.  My musical taste varies, I know, but I'm a huge nostalgia nut and if I like a song, I like the song. There are great songs from my whole life that I recall and love; you know, how you recall where you were, certain people in your circle at the time the song was popular, etc.?  This one made it to No. 6 on Billboard.  It's just a musically and lyrically beautiful song.

THIS DAY'S . . .

This Day's Thought

Faith is obscure.  By faith a man moves through darkness; but he moves securely, his hand in the hand of God.  He is literally seeing through the eyes of God.

Walter Farrell
This Day's Verse
"So you shall serve the LORD your God, and He will bless your bread and your water.  And I will take sickness away from the midst of you."
Exodus 23:25
The New King James Version
This Day's Smile

We need to learn to set our course by the stars, not by the lights of every passing ship.

Omar N. Bradley

Thursday, January 26, 2012


I am so excited about all of the visitors to Abbey's Road.  I just have to list a few and let you know how much your patronage means to me.  Thank you to:

Terre Haute, Indiana
Mt. Laurel, New Jersey (You've been very loyal for a long time!)
Plymouth, Massachusetts
Toronto, Ontario, Canada (Love you, my friend!)
Columbus, Ohio
Brighton, England, UK
London, England
Plano, Texas
Mountain View, California
Fontana, California
Herndon, Virginia (another very loyal follower!)
Sheffield, England
Cave Creek, California
Killeen, Texas
Atlanta, Georgia

and not to forget my very long friendship with Theresa in Adelaide, Australia ♥

and many more. God bless you all and I pray you will always find something of God's Goodness in all that you read here!



Once it was decided that I would enter detox at a hospital under the care of “experts”, I packed a bag to take with me.  The doctor said “just a couple of changes of clothes”.  I packed things that were comfortable, like sweat pants and pullover tops.  I packed my toothbrush, toothpaste, shampoo, but managed to forget a hair dryer.  I had pajamas as I didn’t feel comfortable dressing in a “nightgown”, as such.  Then I sat in my living area and waited.  We were told that we would be contacted “when a bed was available”.  I cried, and then I cried some more.  I wanted to go, I didn’t ask for these hard medications, but I had to have help getting them out of my system.  That was a certainty.
The call finally came around 4:00pm that I was to report to Room 2, Bed 1 at the hospital. I was told to enter through the main entrance and go to the info desk, which I did.  I was told there to walk down this long hallway, to which the information desk person pointed, to the double doors at the end.  Oh my God, help me, my legs are hurting, I am weak and I have to walk this very long hallway to the unit.  This was the beginning of “The Trail of Tears”, which I will expound on later.
We arrived at the double doors, which are locked, and my husband pressed the button and announced my name.  We were given access and a nurse unlocked a very small “conference room” for us to use.  We sat there, looking through the window blinds at the nurses’ station for what seemed like forever. Someone finally told us that they were putting together my chart and it would be ready soon.
While sitting there, I looked at my husband, “I don’t like this place; I feel like I am going to jail.” I cried more and he comforted me and assured me that I was very brave and doing the right thing to get through this process safely.
Finally, two nurses enter the room.  Without asking, they picked up my suitcase, opened it and began going through its contents.  “You cannot have these pants with drawstrings.” I cried, “Just cut them off”.  They opened my shampoo and smelled it to be sure it was shampoo.  They took my telephone charger and I was hanging onto my cell phone for dear life.  Once they finished going through my suitcase, the nurse turned to me, “no cell phones are allow.”  “You mean I can’t even keep my phone?” The tears came hard and heavy as I put my head down on the table.  “No telephones are allowed. There are three phones in the day room and they are turned on twice a day for an hour and you are limited to 10 minutes per call.”  “You mean I cannot talk to my family but once in the morning and once at night?”  “That’s right,” she said.  Then she hit me with the big one, “you are allowed only two visitors, once a day between 7:30-8:30pm!
“You mean I won’t see my husband until tomorrow night and I cannot call him during the day?” Oh how I cried and cried.  “I feel like I am going to jail . . .” My husband does his best to comfort me, but I am going through withdrawal and I feel as though I am going to die before I get better.  My body aches all over (part of withdrawal, I am told), the huge hole in my stomach hurts and I feel doom and gloom to the inth degree!  I am scared out of my wits of what is to come.
The unit is called the “brown unit”.  I’m sure the entire hospital knows what this place is if they hear a call on the intercom from “the brown unit”.  However, there is another unit through the double doors next to the day room which is another unit; a unit for violent and highly addicted people.  The first night there, there was a call on the intercom; I could tell it was an emergency. Suddenly, three men run past me and through the double doors.  I hear yelling and scuffling, “you took my money, I want my money” and it alarms me.  I stopped in my tracks, stunned, listening to the scuffle and yelling on the other side of those doors.  I keep thinking, “The doctor told me I’d be safe.”
A nurse with ratty red hair, and who reminded me of Bette Midler in “The Rose” comes in with my GIANT chart.  She begins going through pages and asks me every question under the sun. As I answer her, I notice her eyes are quickly shifting side to side, to my husband and me, to my husband and me . . . she is wanting to see his response to my answers to see if I am telling the truth. And I am quite truthful about everything; I want to get well.  She comes to a page and says, “It says that you told your doctor that you are thinking of suicide and that you have the means to do it and intend to carry it out.”  I AM SHOCKED! I ask, “Who said that? I never said that. Honey, tell her, I never said that.”  She looks very suspicious.
I hold in my hand a white handkerchief that I started using that day at home when I knew I was headed to the hospital. My crying spells were frequent. I cried all the way on the drive to the hospital and kept telling myself “you can do this! You have to do this! Sweet Jesus, please go with me, hold me up and stay with me through this process.”
Once the very long interview is over, we all get out of our chairs and make our way out the door and stop at the nurses’ station that is right across from the conference room. I am pulling my little suitcase on rollers and I’m sure I looked a mess.  I WAS a mess!  The nurse guided me to the left and showed me the three telephones and the “day room” where there was a large television. There were all kinds of people there, people of all ages, maybe 20 of them.  I don’t focus on anyone; I’m too lost to focus.  When we turn around, my husband is gone. I find out later that while my back was turned, they told him it was the best time to leave, so I cried, “I didn’t get to tell him good-bye!”
The nurse walks me down a very long hallway and my room is the very last one on the right. The walls are painted a peanut butter and yellow color.  It is sickening to me.  As we walk, I notice rooms on both sides and I glance curiously inside as we walk past.  The first thing I note is that there is no television.  When we arrive at my room, I enter and notice the putrid paint scheme, a mattress on a “box” of the same size, a nightstand with a washcloth and towel, a small closet that contains a jersey shirt left by a prior tenant.  The bathroom light is on.  The mirror is actually a very polished metal.  There is no stopper in the tub; wouldn’t want anyone to try and hurt themselves.  Basically, the room has been made totally “safe” from anyone harming themselves.  “You mean I don’t even have a television?”  “No,” the nurse says. “There is a large television in the day room.”  Here I go again crying.  I feel as if I am in prison.  I am at the lowest point of despair that I can remember ever being in my entire life.
The nurse leaves, and I sit down on the bed and cry hard into my hanky so as no one will hear me.  I cried a long time, I could not stop.  I thought of my youngest grandson, who is two, telling me on the phone that very afternoon as I was on my way to the hospital, “I wuv you, Mimi.” I say it aloud and it brings on a wash of tears.  “I want to go home. Jesus, I want to go home! Please Jesus, help me to be strong!”
I laid in a fetal position and had a completely new type of prayer/conversation with the Lord Jesus.  I cried the whole time, my tears and such going into my hanky.  I was concentrating so hard on my talk with Jesus and I asked him, “please put your arms around me and hold me so I will not be afraid.”  At that moment, I felt “something” completely surround me and it gave me goose-bumps. It was something good and comforting.  Jesus was there with me, or else he had his angels surround me and comfort me.  Whatever it was, it came from the divine nature of heaven
I eventually dry up and turn down the blanket and sheet.  “This is not enough to keep me warm.  Oh dear, I have to walk out of this room, go to the nurses’ station and ask for another blanket.” I am frightened and trepid, but as I slowly make my way down the hall, that is when the three men run past me in answer to the call regarding the scuffle going on in the next ward.  I stopped in front of the nurses’ station, alarmed at what I witnessed and heard.  “Am I going to be safe here?”  I asked a nurse if I could close my door.  Yes, good!  She shows me where the linens are and I grab another blanket.  I brought my pillow from home and was glad I did.
I returned to my room with its bright overhead lighting and I just look around for a moment and then decided to open my suitcase and get my toiletries. I take them to the bathroom and I leave the light on inside.  I had to prop the door with the garbage can to keep it open just a few inches. I turned off the bright lights and I got into bed with my clothes on.  In a few moments, I was alarmed by a loud speaker just above my head and am called to the nurses’ station.  I walked down the long hallway again and when I arrive at my destination, I am given my night medication.
One thing about “the brown unit”, there are zero thrills and frills.  You are called to come for everything – nothing is brought to you!  I managed to go to sleep and I am awakened hourly when I hear someone opening my door.  It is the night nurse doing bed checks every hour. This makes me feel better.  I am so tired, I have been going through withdrawal for a week and I am a ragdoll.  There’s nothing left in me to fight, and I sleep until the loud speaker calls me at 6:00am and says the doctor is in and wants to see me.  As I drag my feet down the hallway (my knees are killing me – arthritis and new knee replacement is still sore), I hear the nurse calling other people and we are like zombies in “One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest”, emerging from our rooms, still half-asleep and completely unenthused.
This is the end of Part Two.  I will post Part Three as soon as I can get it down on “paper”.
What I want to impart to you all is that I was an innocent, yet suspicious, patient who had never had drugs like Oxycotin and Oxycodone. The psychiatrist says “the doctors do the surgery and they give you medicines to make you comfortable, and then you end up like you.”  He was right. I’ve been told things I said and did that I cannot recall.  That’s upsetting!  I know I said mean things to my best friend who came to care for me and also to my husband.  I don’t recall much, and that’s the problem.  I don’t like not remembering.  It’s horrid. But they forgave me …..
If not for my very sincere and close relationship to our Heavenly Father and His Son, Jesus Christ, I do not know if I could have mustered the strength to do the right thing, as I did.  Jesus was with me every moment.  By the next morning, my fear was gone, but I was still leery of what the next day held for me.
The only way, the only path to live is the one where you are walking hand-in-hand with Christ. I praise His Holy Name, His Works are wondrous.  Lord, you are mine and I am yours.

Medjugorje Message of January 25, 2012

Today, January 25, 2012, Our Lady appeared to the Medjugorje visionary Marija and gave the following message:
"Dear children! With joy, also today I call you to open your hearts and to listen to my call. Anew, I desire to draw you closer to my Immaculate Heart, where you will find refuge and peace. Open yourselves to prayer, until it becomes a joy for you. Through prayer, the Most High will give you an abundance of grace and you will become my extended hands in this restless world which longs for peace. Little children, with your lives witness faith and pray that faith may grow day by day in your hearts. I am with you. Thank you for having responded to my call."

Wednesday, January 25, 2012


I'm going to try very hard to get the rest of this story posted later this afternoon! Everyone have a very blessed day, and be thankful unto Him for giving you another day to live your life in His Service!!

Love all,



I've learned that it's never too late to improve yourself.  -age 85
I've learned that position can be bought, but respect must be earned.  -age 51
I've learned that the best tranquilizer is a clear conscience.  -age 76
I've learned that if I want the circumstances in my life to change for the better, I must change for the better.  - age 42
I've learned that warmth, kindness, and friendship are the most yearned-for commodities in the world.  The persons who can provide them will never be lonely.  -age 79
I've learned that beyond a certain comfortable style of living, the more material things you have, the less freedom you have.  -age 62
I've learned that attractiveness is a positive, caring attitude and has nothing to do with face lifts or nose jobs.   -age 56
I've learned that ...you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them.
I've learned that ... no matter how much I care, some people just don't care back
I've learned that ...it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.
I've learned that ...it's not what you have in your life, but who you have in your life that counts.age 85
I've learned that if I want the circumstances in my life to change for the better, I must change for the better.  - age 42
I've learned that warmth, kindness, and friendship are the most yearned-for commodities in the world.  The persons who can provide them will never be lonely.  -age 79
I've learned that beyond a certain comfortable style of living, the more material things you have, the less freedom you have.  -age 62
I've learned that attractiveness is a positive, caring attitude and has nothing to do with face lifts or nose jobs.   -age 56
I've learned that ...you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them.
I've learned that ... no matter how much I care, some people just don't care back
I've learned that ...it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.
I've learned that ...it's not what you have in your life, but who you have in your life that counts.

THIS DAY'S . . .

This Day's Thought

Forgiveness means the offense is gone.  I may remember the offense, but I will "remember it against them no more!"

David Stoop

This Day's Verse
Exalt the LORD our God, And worship at His holy hill, For the LORD our God is holy.
Psalm 99:9
The New King James Version

This Day's Smile

Look at everything as though you were seeing it either for the first or last time.  Then your time on earth will be filled with glory.

Betty Smith

Monday, January 23, 2012


May all beings have forgiveness
in their hearts!

May I have forgiveness in my heart for anything I think I've done wrong.

May I forgive myself for what I think were all my past omissions and commissions. They are long gone. I understand that I was a different person then and this one is forgiving the one that I was. May I feel the forgiveness filling me and enveloping me with a sense of warmth and ease.

May I forgive my parents for anything I have ever blamed them for. May I understand that they, too, are different now. May this forgiveness fill them and surround them, and may I know in my heart that this is my most wonderful way of togetherness.

May I forgive my nearest and dearest people for anything that I think they have done wrong or are doing wrong at this time. May they feel that I accept them. May that forgiveness fill them, realizing that this is my expression of love. May I forgive my friends for anything I have disliked about them. May my forgiveness reach out to them so that they can be filled with it and embraced by it.

May I forgive the people I know, whoever they might be, for whatever it is that I have blamed them for, for what I have judged them for, or for what I have disliked. May my forgiveness fill their hearts, and surround and envelope them with it, and let it be my expression of love for them.

May I forgive fully any special person towards whom I still have resentment, rejection, or dislike. May I remember that everyone is suffering. May this forgiveness come from my heart and reach out to that person completely and totally. May I forgive any one person, or any situation, or any group of people, whom I am condemning, blaming, or disliking. May my forgiveness be my expression of unconditional love. They may not do what I think are the right things.

May I remember that all human beings are suffering and that my heart needs forgiveness in order to have purity of love. May I look again and see whether there's still anyone or anything anywhere in the world that I blame or condemn. May I forgive them so that there is no separation in my heart.
May I put my attention back on myself and recognize the goodness in me and the effort I am making. May I feel the warmth and ease that comes from my forgiveness. May all beings have forgiveness in their hearts!



In probably the most expansive decision on the part of the US Federal government ever, the Department of Health and Human Services has issued an "interim final rule" to require virtually all private health plans to include coverage for all FDA-approved prescription contraceptives, female sterilization procedures, and related "patient education and counseling for all women with reproductive capacity."

These are listed among "preventive services for women" that all health plans will have to include without co-pays or other cost sharing--even if the insurer, the employer or other plan sponsor, or the woman herself object to such coverage.

This decision from the Department of Health and Human Services [HHS] is from the highest level of Federal government, and I cannot imagine that this decision was released without the explicit knowledge and approval of President Barack Obama.

And I cannot imagine a more direct and frontal attack on freedom of conscience than this ruling today. This decision must be fought against with all the energies the Catholic Community can muster.

For full information on this issue, please go to the website of the U.S. Catholic Bishops: http://www.usccb.org/news/2012/12-013.cfm

For me there is no other fundamental issue as important as this one as we enter into the Presidential and Congressional campaigns. Every candidate must be pressed to declare his/her position on all of the fundamental life issues, especially the role of government to determine what conscience decision must be followed: either the person's own moral and conscience decision, or that dictated/enforced by the Federal government. For me the answer is clear: we stand with our moral principles and heritage over the centuries, not what a particular Federal government agency determines.

As Bishops we do not recommend candidates for any elected office. My vote on November 6 will be for the candidate for President of the United States and members of Congress who intend to recognize the full spectrum of rights under the many conscience clauses of morality and public policy. If any candidate refuses to acknowledge and to promote those rights, then that candidate will not receive my vote.

This is a sad moment in the life of our country where religious freedom and freedom of conscience led to the formation of this new Nation under God.

Let us all pray that the power of the Holy Spirit will come upon all elected officials of our country, and that all will make decisions based upon God's revealed truth.

~ Cardinal Roger Mahony
Archbishop Emeritus of Los Angeles